Ramble, Yadda Yadda

If you’ve been following my blog for a while then you know how this post is going to go: I mean to say one thing, but I’ll get totally derailed and start talking about something else.  Please bear with me. I apologize in advance.

For the last 24 hours, I have been writing almost non-stop on Blood Resurrection, the final book in the Blood Betrayal Series.  This book has been in the making for over a year and a half and I keep pushing it off.  Why? Because I have to say goodbye to my vampires.

Believe you me, it was not a wise decision to release three different series within 2 years and then decide to end them all at once.  It’s brain suicide to me.  I’ve grown close to my characters and I hate to see them go, so I’m procrastinating.  It has to happen eventually though, right?

[sad face]

So anyway, my mind has wandered, as it tends to do, and I’ve been thinking about many different things tonight.

One thought I often have is, “Man, I suck. I really suck.  Why do I keep doing this to myself?”

I think that’s a thought a lot of writers can relate to.  We all doubt ourselves at one point or another during this journey.  Some of us only think it once, or if you’re like me, you think it often.

I can’t help it. It’s not that I don’t love my stories.  It’s not that I’m not proud of them–trust me, I am.  I’m so proud it hurts sometimes.  They say anyone can write a book, but that simply isn’t true.  I know lots of people , who will willingly admit, they can’t string an entire sentence together and make it make sense.

Those of us who can tell stories, we are rare.  Sure, go ahead and think anyone can write a book, but I’m telling you right now not everyone is a storyteller.

Where was I?  Self-doubt.  Right.

I do it more than I want to admit and it can be downright discouraging.  I read back through my manuscripts and go between “Oh my god, that’s awful” to “Wow, I really wrote that?  Really?

Writing is my life. I breathe writing. I live writing.  If I could marry writing?  Heck yeah, I would. We’ve been meant to be be since the day I came into the world and we will live happily ever after, but right now….

Yeah, the weird thoughts linger.  I can’t help it.  I know I don’t completely suck because I have fans.  I have readers who ask every day when the next book is coming out.  I’m trying–I swear I am, but sometimes I get distracted by pretty shiny things.  My bad.

I also understand there is room for improvement.  Comparing the last book I released to the very first one I ever published is like reading two very different books from two very different people.  This is a learn-as-you-go experience. You get better with time.  You get better with the advice you receive from others and from what readers have to say in their reviews.  (I cannot stress ENOUGH how important it is to at least give an example of what can be corrected when you leave a review. It helps TREMENDOUSLY.)

Blah blah. I’m rambling. I know.

I haven’t made a blog post in a while so I thought, what the heck? Why not?  And this is the result.  I may have almost 4,000 likes on my author page now, and I may receive high praise from people who fall in love with my characters (which I am so grateful for), but I still have self-doubt and it’s likely I always will.

I’m not perfect at what I do, but I tell stories the best way I can, as only I can.

We are all different.

I can’t compare myself to Anne Rice or Stephen King, but I can aspire to write wonderful stories just as they do–and that is exactly what I try to accomplish.

Don’t ever compare yourself to another writer because there is only one THEM and only one YOU.

Get what I’m saying?

I hope so. I tend not to make sense in these little rambles, but there you have it.

I think now is a good time to shut up, so happy reading, happy writing, happy life. <3

My Dream Cast for the remake of The Craft

Hey, 90’s kids.  I’m sure you’ve heard by now, they’re remaking The Craft.

I know.  I know.  My heart broke, too. I might have cried a bit as well.  You can’t just mess with these things.  I have watched a lot of movies I’ve loved get remade.  Some of them were good and some of them were more like…

“What the HECK were you thinking?”

I won’t name them…nope.

Anyway, so now they’re remaking The Craft which is undeniably one of the best films from my adolescence.  It was so full of magic and teen angst.  Who didn’t like it?

My friend shared an article with me about the ‘recast’ of The Craft and while I agreed with two of their casting choices, I thought it might be fun to make one of my own.  So without further adieu…

Sarah Bailey – originally portrayed by Robin Tunney

My choice: Emma Watson

Nancy Downs – originally portrayed by Fairuza Balk

My choice: Chloe Grace Moretz

Bonnie – originally portrayed by Sidney Prescott..I mean, Neve Campbell

My choice: Violet Harmon…I mean Taissa Farmiga 

Rochelle – originally portrayed by Rachel True

My choice: Bianca Lawson (I believe she’s a vampire. She never ages.)

Laura Lizzie – originally portrayed by Christine Taylor

My choice: Penelope Mitchell

Chris Hooker – originally portrayed by Skeet Ulrich

My choice: Dylan O’Brien (Are you really surprised?)

(My other choices for this role would be Ezra Miller or Daniel Sharman)

Lirio – originally portrayed by Assumpta Serna

My choice(s) : Eva Green or Natalie Dormer

So what do you think? Do you agree? Disagree? Have other choices in mind?  I’d love to hear about them.

Let’s hope they don’t screw this one up.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the graphics and I don’t claim to.  They are merely used for entertainment purposes. x


For the Silent Mothers

Image credit

Perhaps “silent mothers” is the wrong term to use, but I’m not sure what else to call it.  Quiet? Forgotten? Overlooked?

Whatever it is, I am one of them.  Mother’s Day is always hard for me because I feel cheated.  I should have a little one who brings me cards and gives me kisses on Mother’s Day, but I don’t.  It’s something not a lot of people know about me, but after almost 10 years, I think it’s time to come clean and not be afraid to talk about it anymore.

Sometimes I believe it’s better it worked out the way it did because me and the father never would have worked as a couple.  He was an okay guy, but he wasn’t the man for me.  I honestly don’t know that I’ll ever find ‘the one’ because I always get screwed over, but the last break-up..with him..was the most painful thing I’ve ever experienced and I promised myself I’d never go through anything like that again.

Kind of like a miscarriage.

When I was found out I was pregnant I was scared and excited at the same time.  I was scared because I was only 20 years old.  Sometimes I get that mixed up.  Sometimes I think I was 20, other times I think I was 21…but I was definitely 20 when it happened.  Geez, it’s such a blur that I honestly can’t tell you half of what went on when I realized I was losing my baby.

It makes you angry.  It makes you question God and what he’s doing.  Why would he let me get my hopes up, fill my heart with love in anticipation of becoming a mother only to take it away from me?

What’s the point of going through the pains of labor if I don’t get to take a baby home with me?

It still brings tears to my eyes.  i still cry about it.  I dream about my baby sometimes, too.

Some people say that it doesn’t count if you miscarry early in pregnancy, but trust me, it does.  It still guts you and shreds you in a way that is beyond comprehension.  There is a pain that no one can possibly understand unless they have been through it, too.

When the doctor told me I was losing my baby, I held my stomach and cried.  I never got to experience that first ultrasound.  I never got to hear a heartbeat.  I never got to feel a tiny kick or paint a nursery.

But I did imagine how wonderful life would be with a child that had my eyes or my smile.  I thought about names and I had my heart set on Cameron for a boy and…well, I never came up with a girl name because I was confident I was having a boy.

My baby was going to arrive on September 9th, 2006.  He would have been born only a few short months before I turned 21.  I had already determined that even if the father didn’t want to be in my baby’s life, I’d be okay.  My family, well, the ones I was allowed to tell at that time, would help me.

My mother bought me maternity clothes.

I never got to wear them.

You just can’t understand this pain if you’ve never been through it.  I swear.  The tears randomly fall and the empty ache in your heart never goes away.

I feel robbed.  It’s not fair.

I would have been a good mom.  I would have done anything for my child.

I wanted to read him bedtime stories.  I wanted to take him to the park.  I wanted to teach him to ride a bicycle and I wanted his little paintings on my fridge.

But I never got it.

I haven’t tried since then.  I haven’t even been in a relationship because it scarred me in such a terribly profound way.

Mother’s Day is supposed to be a day of celebration for ALL mothers, but some of us get forgotten.  We are the ones who bow our heads and silently weep for children we never had a chance to hold.  We don’t get cards.  We don’t get flowers.

I did receive a card on the first Mother’s Day after my miscarriage and I still have it.  It was from my sister-in-law.  She said that all mothers needed to be celebrated and I still counted as one.

I’ll never forget that.

But it’s hard for this day to roll around, to see people posting pictures with their children, especially those who are around the age of what my child would have been.

8.  My child would be 8 right now.

I am so far off track from what I originally wanted to say.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the silent mothers.  To the ones who grieve the loss of an angel baby.  You are still a mommy, and trust me when I say your baby is waiting for you.  You’ll see them again one day.

But until then, know that I am thinking of you.  Know that you are not alone.  Your hurt is my hurt as mine is yours.  Like I said, no one can understand it unless they’ve been through it and it is not something I’d wish on anyone.

Happy Mother’s Day <3


IABB T-shirt offers May 9th

As most of you know I have been helping out over at IABB and we have been creating some pretty amazing t-shirts for our followers.  I decided it would be easier to make a list here so you can find ALL of them!  We’ve received so many compliments and thank you to everyone for taking a chance on them.  It’s seriously appreciated and it is really neat to see all the pics you’ve been taking once they arrive.  Most of these come in various colors so hopefully you’ll find something that suits you.  xx










Check out this GIVEAWAY for a chance to win one signed by over 60 authors and cover models.








My “how-to” guide of being an indie author

I am creating this blog post in hopes of helping out new authors and perhaps even veteran authors if they haven’t dabbled too much in social media. I’ve made similar posts in the past, but this one is brand new and I’ll try to make it more step-by-step.

Create an author page

The first thing you’re going to want to do if you get into the business of being an indie author is to create an author page. This is very easy to do and you can find more instructions on creating a page HERE.

Invite other authors and readers to like your page

The first piece of advice I can give you –and it’s seriously heartfelt, I swear— please do not friend authors just to post this note to their wall: Hey! Come like my page please!  That will seriously ruin the moment. If you’re going to friend authors, be kind and courteous. Say hello. Ask how they are. Get to know them. Don’t bombard them with a request to like your page because some of them really don’t like that and feel a little used when it happens. Instead, find book blog pages and ask them to share your author link. I also recommend including what genre you write and if you have any books available.

Get people involved

I’m going back to the page thing here and messaging book blogs. A lot of book blogs will make posts asking for new-to-me authors. This is a great opportunity. Jump on it! Just leave a comment with your page link and what genre you write. The readers will find you. Also be sure to message another blog or two with your author page and kindly ask them to share it for you. Please and thank you go a long way in this business.

So you need to know how to create an event?

Here is another helpful link to check out. Once you’ve created your event, don’t be afraid to invite reader friends. If you’re too shy, bring on another host, someone you trust, and let them invite people. Friends will invite friends and it’ll go from there.

You’re ready to publish your book, or you already have. Now what?

Some authors say writing the book is the hardest part, or maybe it’s the editing, but to me the hardest part is promoting it. It can be difficult to get your book noticed, but please remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day. Don’t expect the book sales to roll in over night. You’ll have to work for it. Message blogs (remember please and thank you) and give them your links with a teaser. My best advice is to have a C&P document pulled up so you can grab the links and share them when you need to. It’s SO MUCH easier. I promise.

If you need images for teasers, I recommend www.dollarphotoclub.com. It’s my favorite.

You want a street team, huh?

Street teams are amazing and so wonderful in my opinion.  They aren’t all nightmares. I love my girls.  If you want to make a street team then please have a look at this link.  There are many, many helpful links. Consult Google.  He is your best friend. Promise.

You’re interested in doing a takeover? Okay.

There are a lot of book blogs that offer for authors to do takeovers on their pages. You can message blogs and ask them if they do takeovers in which case this is what happens:

A date is scheduled in which you will go on their blog, maybe an hour, maybe an entire day, as an admin which means you can post under their blog name. This is great opportunity to tell people about you and what you write. Post your book links, teasers, and talk about YOU. Readers love getting to know authors. Play games with them, give away some prizes (ebooks, bookmarks, gift cards, etc). If you’re anything like me, money doesn’t grow on trees. It’s hard to offer a lot of things other than ebook copies most of the time. I would seriously suggest considering a mobi or epub file of your books to send directly to their kindle.

Learn how to create mobi or epub files HERE, and learn how to send directly to kindles HERE.

I sincerely hope I’ve helped a little, and if I missed anything please feel free to leave input in the comments.

Good luck, authors. Happy writing. xx

Remembering Columbine 16 years later

I know I’m a day behind on posting this and that’s because I really didn’t know what I wanted to say.  Young people from my generation are groaning over turning 30 this year (I’m not), but I think they need to keep in mind growing older is a privilege not many get to take advantage of.

My generation has seen many terrible things happen.  We watched the news develop in our classrooms and those are memories we aren’t likely to forget.  I can remember listening to stories my grandmother would tell me and how she’d say, “I was there”, and it was always so surreal.  I couldn’t imagine witnessing something like that.

9/11 unfolded right before my very eyes when I was fifteen years old.  I didn’t understand.  I couldn’t even wrap my head around why such a terrible, horrible thing would happen.  We sat in silence with our heads bowed.  Tears fell.  We just didn’t understand.

But it’s not the first time, nor will it be the last, that we stared at television screens while confusion wreaked havoc on our hearts and minds.

I was in the 7th grade when tragedy struck Littleton, Colorado. 12 students and 1 teacher lost their lives that day. The world as I knew it changed. I no longer felt safe at school. Metal detectors were placed at the entrance and we were required to use plastic, see-through backpacks. My teachers no longer looked cheerful. They were weary, disheartened. Looking back on that, I really can’t blame them. I think we all felt it.

The world changed for everyone.

I know it’s not the first instance of violence to take place in a school setting, but it was the first time my brain could understand it and trust me, that wasn’t easy.

How could anyone do that? Why would they do it? What goes through a person’s mind, in their heart, to make them capable of such ruthlessness?

I live in a very small country town and things like this just don’t happen, but I think that day was the day I realized safety isn’t a guarantee, no matter where you live.

I think of Columbine often. We were required to write a paper on it not even a month after it happened and my mind wandered back to one student in particular. Maybe it’s because of my faith—no, it is definitely because of my faith, but I think of Cassie Bernall. I remember her name because I wrote my paper about her.

One of the gunmen asked her if she believed in God and she said yes without hesitation. He killed her.

It was only recently that I read an article stating it was actually her friend, a survivor, Valeen Schnurr who was asked this question.

I realize that violence happens every day, everywhere. I know there are many school children that lose their lives in other countries and my heart breaks for them. No, I don’t get why people do it. I don’t understand how a guy can walk into a movie theatre and open fire. I’ll never be able to comprehend how a boy can enter a school building full of innocent children and kill them in cold blood.

We will never truly know and that breaks my heart. So much tragedy. So much violence. So much murder.

Now here is the part where I’m going to lose you, and for that I’m not entirely sorry. No matter what your belief may be, I know what mine is.

There is a special place in Hell for these killers. These men and women who take it upon themselves to play God, to choose who lives and who dies…they will have to answer for their crimes before MY God and on that day of judgment, I hope their victims can find comfort in knowing their deaths were not in vain.

I can’t believe it’s been 16 years.

We’ve seen so much happen since then and I fear what will happen in the future. I know my niece and nephew will one day look at a TV screen and their mouths will fall open as they watch, helplessly, another town fall victim to the brutality of a soulless killer.

I wish I could protect them from it forever. I wish we lived in a place where EVERY life mattered, because every life SHOULD matter.

I sincerely hope you will thank your lucky stars that you woke up today. Don’t complain about the gray hair you’re getting and don’t mutter about those wrinkles around your eyes and mouth. Remember those who will never have that opportunity. Be grateful that you’ll get to blow the candles out on your birthday cake and take pride in seeing those numbers, no matter if they read 18, 25, 30, or 80. There are families out there who quietly watch birthdays pass by. They don’t have anyone to celebrate those with anymore and they have to visit a grave instead.

Just remember that.

May the souls of all who fall at the hands of the heartless rest in peace.

Ridener’s Reviews: Paranormal Heat by G. Mallone

So first and foremost I have to send out an apology to G. Mallone.  Apparently Amazon won’t let me leave a review because they say we’re friends.  Stalker much? And why can’t I leave a review?  I leave reviews for everybody! GRRRR.

Anyway, so I had the pleasure of reading Paranormal Heat: A Collection of Erotic Short Stories.  I normally do not read erotica, but G’s is just so beautifully written and it touches your heart.  Yes, it’s spicy and sexy, but it’s also sweet and romantic.  I really, really enjoyed each story.

5 out of 5 stars

Buy it HERE.


This book of short stories is perfect for readers on-the-go. Varying from 8 to 15,000 words, Paranormal Heat contains three spicy stories with a paranormal twist. For readers 18+ due to graphic sexual content and strong language. NSFW.

MADNESS– Vincent finds himself in the same room as his beautiful wife and the handsome shifter he’s been having an affair with on the side one night. Will catastrophe follow or is there something more?

COUGAR’S HEAT– Beckham Marlow returns home for summer break from college and runs into his old babysitter. Allie Buchanan, recently widowed and harboring a secret, may make their reunion a little friendlier than originally anticipated. Cougars can be fun and somewhat naughty, but what happens when Beckham discovers Allie is the real deal?

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO– A twenty-something author decides he needs a change and moves halfway across the country in hopes of overcoming his writer’s block so he can finish the ultimate fantasy romance novel. Instead he inherits a pretty little blonde ghost who can’t seem to keep her hands off him. Most ghosts have an appetite for mischief, but Keegan Taylor’s ghost girl is hungry for him.


Three very delightful, sexy stories.  I loved the characters and while the stories are short I swear they were better than most full length novels I have read.  The only complaint I have is I REALLY want to know what happens between Beckham and Allie.  PLEASE say you’re writing a follow-up for them, G!

OH, and another favorite part? There’s also some M/M and something about the fact the scenes were written by a man made it 10000x hotter in my mind.  I’d love to see more of that, but that’s probably just a personal preference.

Keep writing, G.  I can’t wait to read more!